Civility derives from the Latin term Civilis, meaning “relating to public life, befitting a citizen”. Some take this to mean being friendly and nice to everyone.
In my opinion, being friendly and nice to everyone can cause a person to appear disingenuous or as if they are presenting a facade. I prefer striving for transparency, balanced by kindness.
I desire to demonstrate regard for every person that I interact with. Some I hold in high regard, and some, nothing more than basic human kindness. Regard means “showing respect and caring for someone” or “acting with humanity”. Not a mark I always hit, but this is what I strive for.
Why is civility important? Without civility, we cannot productively relate with those who may not share our views or conduct ourselves in a way which promotes progress and understanding.
We sometimes consider those who do not share certain viewpoints or beliefs we find important as evil. This may cause us to show disregard, disdain, and possibly hostility towards the evil person.
Contrary to what some may believe, incivility is not a product of social media. Modern social media may have further undermined civility, but it did not create incivility.
In 1520, Martin Luther allegedly used the printing press to circulate his thoughts about Pope Leo X. Calling him the anti-Christ and referring to the church as a brothel.
The blatant misuse of a then, modern media platform.
In the Masonic Lodge as well as in most polite society, what two topics are widely forbidden? Religion and politics.
We have spent so much time not talking about these two contentious subjects. This may have caused us to fall out of practice in the art of rhetoric and thus allowed this perishable skill to become dull.
(Remember, the art of rhetoric has an enhanced meaning to us Masons)
Social media and the pseudo-anonymity it represents, matched with the 24-hour news stream otherwise known as “outrage journalism”.
Social media, the place where you can say almost anything without fear of being physically injured for doing so, has spawned “outrage discourse”. Outrage journalism and outrage discourse together could be considered “outrage porn”.
With a diminished ability to conduct a civil conversation, and a seemingly growing addiction to outrage porn, is it any wonder we are so divided?
Therefore, the recent awareness to the increase of incivility may be the result of a perfect storm of circumstance.
How do we as Masons promote civility?
Those contentious conversations need to be had, just not in the way we’ve been having them. To maintain Masonic solemnity and harmony, they should still not be conducted in Lodge. Though, they do need to be had with brother Masons as well as with the profane. Like any other bad habit, a person may desire to replace it with a good habit; the first step is the realization that the current habit is unacceptable. Followed by a commitment to mitigate negative behaviors.
To show regard for all people is a very Masonic thing to do, so much so that we, as Masons, are reminded every time we meet, that “every human being has a claim upon our kind offices.”
I made a conscious decision to wade into some of these contentious discussions, but only after making a commitment to myself to leave all the negative emotions behind regardless of where the other party takes the discussion. If I find that I am struggling to do this, then I will leave the conversation before I have to apologize for my words and/or deeds only to resume it at a point when I am certain I can fulfill my commitment.
This practice has led to unlikely friendships and has significantly increased my ability to empathize with my fellow humans at a deeper level.
Is the fine art of civility a Masonic value? I say it is more than a value, it’s fundamental to our society and therefore fundamental to our craft.
Fervently,
Brother Robert Lougee – Senior Deacon, Kennewick Lodge #153 and Senior Deacon, Richland Lodge #283 - Grand Lodge of Free and Accepted Masons of Washington | Castle Island Virtual Lodge #190 - Grand Lodge of Ancient, Free and Accepted Masons of Manitoba