The Various Seasons of the Masonic Journey

The various stages of a Masons life and why we need to meet the brother where he is.

Photo by Jim Robinson on Unsplash

Recently, I wrote about my experiences which brought me to the West Gate of Freemasonry.  This caused me to reflect on what has happened in my life since then.  I did not begin this journey until my children were out of the house and I was established in my career.  This is not the case with many Masons that I know. 

There are Masons who earn the degrees before marriage and children. Some of these men end up taking a break while they start a family and only to return years later when their life can better accommodate the time needed to be a Mason.  Early on in our journey, we are taught that God, Family, vocation and then Masonry is the proper priority.  I most admire this aspect of our craft.

No one should question your decision to attend or not attend Masonic functions unless you hold a station or place and have committed to be in Lodge at the times necessary to fulfill your commitment.

For me, I can regularly attend most of the Masonic functions that I desire to because I am unencumbered with family obligations and have an incredibly supportive wife, who also enjoys the fellowship and participates in every way she is able to.

What about the brethren among us who are business owners and cannot be away from their businesses to attend Lodge functions?  What about the sick and/or infirmed brother who can no longer get to Lodge?  What do we do about them?  These two scenarios are not the same as the brother with family obligations and who must tend to their spouse and children or livelihood to ensure that his responsibilities are met, but they’re close.  The man raising his family along with the man who has work obligations has made a choice to put them into the proper priority and therefore should be considered an honorable man for his efforts to put family first. 

We see this quite often in our brothers. I like to think it’s because we get here as good men.  Good men value their families and their workplace responsibilities, so it is no wonder this is commonplace to not see a man in Lodge for these reasons. 

Should these brothers who aren’t in regular attendance be cast aside and forgotten until such a time when they can become regular participants in Masonry and rejoin our fraternity? I very adamantly say no, we must not ignore them until they make it back to lodge.  Giving this man space that he did not ask for may be the reason that men join a lodge, fall away, and never return.
If the man says no thank you to our efforts, then we must respect his wishes. 

However, I think most of us appreciate the occasional chat to catch up, or meet up to share a meal, go to the range, etc., even though we may not be able make it to lodge for the stated communication.  After all, men in this position are still Masons and we are still bound by that greater tie.

What about the man who owns his own business and is working at times the meetings are scheduled?  It could be that if he isn’t tending to his business, it is not being tended to.  How do we converse with and fellowship with him?  It may be easier to dismiss his situation as he knows where we are when he decides to join us. What if we are of the mindset that we will support his business and help him be successful all while we enjoy his company? Which idea best honors our obligation as Masons?  This man will likely never ask for your support, but I promise you he will appreciate it when it’s offered. 

Now consider the sick or infirmed brothers. This is a difficult one for me. Most of my experience with the men in our lodges in this season of life have been out of our presence. Since I have not met them, it is awkward for me to think about visiting them.  What will we talk about? This is where it is time to leave my comfort zone and make that attempt to contact these brothers even if it is uncomfortable.  Like I mentioned before, many of these men will not reach out and ask for us to spend time with them, it is on us to do so.  Also, as previously mentioned they will appreciate it when we follow through.

We wring our hands over our declining ranks, but there are free and simple solutions to retain these good men and to truly practice this gentle craft.

Finally, my brothers, be mindful of the different seasons of a man’s life in Masonry and respond to your brethren as they want to be responded to.