When a Hobby Goes Wrong

What happens when the very thing you do for refreshment and purpose turns into a dark and foreboding chapter in your life?

Photo by Francesco Alberti on Unsplash

I am sure everyone has something in their life that provides great fulfillment and respite from their day-to-day struggles. Let’s consider that you have a hobby which provides an abundance of joy and satisfaction.

What happens if your important pursuit or hobby ceases to deliver those things which appealed to you in the first place? 

Even worse, what if these sources of pleasure and refreshment become undesirable, contentious, or objectionable?

To frame it differently; what if something which was once a cherished and laudable pursuit becomes dreadful and ignominious? What would you do?
What if that former source of pleasure and adoration was Freemasonry, does this change your answer?

This is where I find myself currently. The past several months has been emotionally brutal for me.  Two of the three legs of the stool of life balance are now significantly disproportionate to the third.  The family leg is sturdy and intact. So far withstanding the stress. Both the labor and refreshment legs are at best, precariously attached by mere fibers.  For me, Freemasonry at least partially comprises both the labor and refreshment legs of the stool.  My career completes the labor leg. 

It is time to take to the proverbial wood lathe and turn new legs from a more resilient hardwood to replace the failing ones to make that stool sturdy again.
Make no mistake, the institution of Freemasonry is alive and well for me. My zeal for the greater Craft is flourishing. It’s said that Masonry is different in each jurisdiction. Even from Lodge to Lodge. Some better and some worse than others. 

I wholeheartedly share this sentiment.  This is the first time on my Masonic journey that I have felt the betrayal I am currently feeling from my brother Masons. This has confused me.  I have been told by some who are wiser than me that these good brothers took the same obligation as I have. They also are reminded of the same tenets contained within the closing charge as am I, each time we meet.

As for my current Lodge, this is where a geographical change will take place for me.  Time to move on, shed the unsavory aspects and look for better days to come.  No need hanging around somewhere when through both word and deed, it’s been made clear you are not wanted.
My Masonic horizons are still bright, and I will employ my working tools where I and they, are valued.

To quote a line from the song, “Shoot me again” from the album, St. Anger and performed by my favorite band, Metallica.

With all the resilience and tenacity, I possess, there’s one thing I have to say to the universe.
“Shoot me again, I ain’t dead yet”